Thursday, January 05, 2012

You can't take me anywhere

The first time I met one of the Phenom's previous bosses, I was dumbstruck.  Rather, I knew that since the only likely thing to come blurting out of my mouth would be so socially inappropriate, my only other option was to remain silent.  The man had no neck.  Like the narrator in the Rocky Horror Picture Show.  It was painful, but I managed to clamp my mouth shut and not say "where's your fuckin' neck?"  Ya'll should be proud.

Phenom has intentionally avoided letting me meet one of the higher level wonks at his work place because this guy is notorious for promoting (like from receptionist to department head) the women with whom he sleeps.  I once observed, in a social setting, "so, He's the one."  When friends pressed me to explain what I meant, I said "the answer to the question 'who do I have to sleep with around here to get ahead."  Thus, I've not been asked to tag along to work functions anymore out of fear I'll actually say that to him.

But, there is one guy from the Phenom's past I think I should get a pass on.  A guy from the college days.  Phenom describes being in his dorm room, studying, when another dorm resident came running in and announced that "Jr ____ has the clap."  I think that should I ever meet Jr., I should be able to ask if he ever got the clap cleared up.

But, for some reason, Phenom shows no interest in attending college reunions.

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