Deer season is over . . .

I live in an area frequently referred to as the "bible belt." I sometimes have a hard time getting a read on how humans in other parts of the world view various bits and pieces because what I've come to expect has been so skewed by the overly religious nature of where I live. For example, on webkinz, there are "games" that I'm surprised haven't been totally shut down by parents going nuts . . .like the "wishing well" which is essentially a slot machine. Or the games that involve wacking a "zingo" which is a little creature. Also, there is a character called "booger" . . . which in the south is often viewed by parents as a "bad word."

Around here, churches deal with the evil holiday of halloween one of two ways, typically; they have "harvest festivals" or they have "hell houses" which are suppose to scare little children into being good christians by giving them a glimpse into the fires and agonies of hell. I'm not making this stuff up.

Now that the holidays have past . . . and deer season is over . . . so bible thumping season has begun. Each weekend, we see car loads of people descend upon our neighborhood . . . and breaking into groups of three and four, spread out over the neighborhood to go door to door offering their specific brand of salvation.

We generally hide in our house until they have vacated the area. You never want to open your door to these people . . . they won't ever leave . . . and they will forever target you for their attentions.

I am tempted to arm myself with a copy of the Bill of Rights and wait on the front porch for them some weekend . . . and have a little chat about how "freedom of religion" includes the freedom to not practice religion . . . and my personal idea of "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" includes not having to cower in my own home until they move on to our neighbors.

But, I'm basically a coward . . . so I'll continue to hide and wait until spring when their attentions will be turned to constructing easter panoramas across the countryside. My favorite local display involves several inflated easter bunnies in bright colors gazing upwards upon crosses with awe in their faces. And, that's asking a lot of an inflated bunny.