One step away from a cabin in the woods

I had several motivations for starting this blogging bit. I was twisting with angst and needed an outlet. I have always journaled, but in recent years have let literally years pass between putting ink to paper. I have always been interested in writing, and find that when I'm actively writing, I tend to observe more, think in terms of writing, and generally am happier. I have been living in the proverbial closet too long and needed an outlet for expressing my outrageous (I know, for many of you, it's a tad tame -- but if you knew the community I live in, you'd see that I'm the wildest thing around, and I'm not just talking hair and animal musk.) opinions.

As stated before, I actually researched a bit before committing to the whole public journal idea. I realized that there is safety - and creative outlet - in working to protect my and other's identities. I have never posted cruel lashing outs at specific people. I have never posted strange and hideous details of my, um, intimacies. (and, truly, aren't you all breathing and sleeping a bit easier for it? Although, it's not called the "wild monkey dance" for nothing. Ha!)

Anyway, I've confessed my love of gossip, my gambling habit, and several of my rather easy to tell lies. Now, I have another confession to lay on all of you.

I have become addicted to blogs. Not just mine. Other blogs. I sometimes spend an hour in the evening just skimming through blogs looking for good ones. I have to say, there is a whole lot of crap out there. But, I have a whole list of "friends" I need to check in on daily to see if they've posted anything new.

I guess what I find most disturbing about this is that in the past I've commented with derision about people who don't have real, live friends -- and substitute the online community for a social life. I've not done that, yet.

It is a bit like being a stalker/peeper --- I get to peer into the lives of people without their knowing I'm doing it --- and I have no social obligation to interact. Isn't that exactly the best and worst aspect of the web all rolled into one?

Maybe this confession will help me curb the habit a bit -- or at least resist the urge to ignore all my live friends and move into a cabin in the woods to type up my manifesto. Maybe.