Sometime last year, I read a statistic that 8 million Americans believe they have been abducted by aliens. Well, abducted and "probed." Apparently, alien abduction is a particularly American phenomenon. I don't know why. I'm just reporting what I've heard.
Well, events over the weekend have me wondering if I was abducted . . . and promptly returned . . . by aliens.
I'll tell you my evidence . . . flimsy though it may be . . . and you tell me what you think.
I have a rather regimented sleep habit. I like to breathe cold air, but hate cold air on my skin. So, I sleep under several warm layers. At the moment, I have polar fleece sheets, a quilt, a silk filled comforter, and a regular comforter on the bed. I also have a thick memory foam pad on the bed. I fear smothering in my sleep, so I always sleep on my back . . . with the pillows scrunched up under my neck, and the covers pulled up to my chin. I also tend to be a light sleeper.
The other night, I woke up from a very deep sleep to find that I was face down, across the bed and on top of the covers. A position I never would have gotten into myself . . . even drunk . . . and I have no recollection of anything that would have put me in such a position.
My only conclusion is I was picked up by aliens . . . sucked out through the closed window . . . and immediately returned . . . returned so quickly they didn't even take the time to restore me to a moment before the abduction.
I am, however, willing to entertain other rational explanations. oh yeah, and my pants were on the foot of the bed. But that couldn't mean anything, could it?
4 comments:
Check your neck for implants...cause nothing else is making sense to me.
ahahahaha....
Obviously you were abducted by the alien-abductor-in-training in the animated short that precedes Ratatouille.
Ding! Ding! Ding! I think Frenchy is exactly right!!! A trainee alien!!! It makes perfect sense. But, should I be insulted or relieved?
If your yard is still intact and nothing's bruised or broken, I'd say "relieved."
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